Pay attention to Non-Verbal cues

How many of you as a listener notice the speaker’s body language and have eye contact during having conversation with them? If rarely, is it because you don’t care to take into consideration since it does not matter while listening? If yes, know that it’s a biggest mistake you are committing as a listener.

http://www.doitnow.co.za/sites/default/files/styles/475/public/images/articles/body_language.jpg?itok=5BCT7eLw

To be a good listener you need to notice their body language, eye movements and gestures while having conversation with them. Know and keep in mind that all this can turn out to be useful to us when listening. We don’t just listen with our ears but also with our eyes. You get to understand what they speaker is conveying to you more clearly when you watch and pick up the additional information being transmitted through non-verbal communication. It may also give you clues what you may want to ask or say them next. http://calebstorkey.com/listening-skills-11-steps-to-become-a-good-listener/

If a speaker lacks in showing non-verbal cues it might be signs suggesting that they are carefully controlling their body language to hide their emotions. http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/nonverbal-communication.html

So, as a good listener you need to notice all this and move accordingly to the situations to help them by providing them solutions. It not only improves your judgement but also it shows them you care and notice more.

It is always said that if you notice, listen and understand more in a person they tend to share their feeling more with you.

If you find my post was useful then please share it with your friends. Also, if you have any comments or thoughts please feel free to suggest it in the comment box.

References

(n.d.). Retrieved from doitnow: http://www.doitnow.co.za/sites/default/files/styles/475/public/images/articles/body_language.jpg?itok=5BCT7eLw

Listening Skills – 11 Steps to Become a Good Listener. (n.d.). Retrieved from calebstorkey: http://calebstorkey.com/listening-skills-11-steps-to-become-a-good-listener/

Non-Verbal Communication. (n.d.). Retrieved from skillsyouneed: http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/nonverbal-communication.html

Try to limit distraction to become a more effective listener

How often do you get distracted in home or at work place? It’s a question that’s something to be thought, right?

http://2012books.lardbucket.org/books/a-primer-on-communication-studies/section_05/1e266fe2f4feab12a558016e9230a7dc.jpg

Distractions can come in all shapes and sizes. Most of us get distracted several times when we are trying to do something, if not dozens of times, every day. We get phone calls or an emergency to do something leaving our work back.

Apart from this, to be serious, as a good listener we should learn to resist distractions when we are having conversation with them, whether it be internal distraction (hunger and thirst) or external distraction (phone calls or television sound). For instance, if you are trying to have conversation with your friend while someone else is watching a horror movie in the same room. Do you think you can listen? Pretty impossible, right? https://www.boundless.com/communications/textbooks/boundless-communications-textbook/learning-to-listen-and-helping-others-do-the-same-5/enhancing-your-listening-32/be-a-serious-listener-resist-distractions-and-listen-actively-143-4212/

So, learn to avoid distractions as much as possible. Here are some ways you can follow to become a good listener:

·         Turn off all mobile devices so you are not tempted to look at it.

·         Move to a quiet place where you are away from TV so you don’t get distracted by listening.

·         Maintain eye contact by paying attention to the person. It’s a way you can stay present while they are talking.

If you follow these ways, I am pretty sure you can become a good listener. If you have any comments or thoughts please feel free to say. Also, if you have followed these steps please share if it worked for you or not.

References

(n.d.). Retrieved from lardbucket: http://2012books.lardbucket.org/books/a-primer-on-communication-studies/section_05/1e266fe2f4feab12a558016e9230a7dc.jpg

(n.d.). Retrieved from boundless: https://www.boundless.com/communications/textbooks/boundless-communications-textbook/learning-to-listen-and-helping-others-do-the-same-5/enhancing-your-listening-32/be-a-serious-listener-resist-distractions-and-listen-actively-143-4212/

Learn to reflect back by asking questions and providing feedback

http://blog.readytomanage.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/giving-feedback-to-others.jpg

The most common mistake that people do is they don’t ask questions. As a listener if you are reading this, stop for a moment and think about it from their place. Do you feel worried then?

In my case as a speaker I would definitely say yes, because I have been through that condition where I say something to my friends and all they do is nod their head or say yes/no answer.

If you as a listener do this mistake, try to stop it now. The only way you can be a good listener and make people feel you have an interest in what they say is by asking questions. But if you want to be interesting to them, share things. And if you want to be intriguing, then share your point of view with them. http://www.fastcompany.com/3049644/how-to-be-a-success-at-everything/why-being-a-good-listener-is-holding-you-back

Know that questioning and listening are joined at the hip. Asking open-ended question encourages the person to talk and also it is another way to get more information about specific areas you are unclear about. http://www.sellingpower.com/content/article/?a=6526/how-to-be-a-good-listener

Here are some steps that you should follow as a good listener:

• Learn to provide feedback to the speaker by telling them how you feel about their viewpoint. It’s a difficult task for sure, since you need to put feelings into words. But once you learn to master the art of emotional labelling, you will notice how it makes major difference in the quality of conversations with your friends, bosses or loved ones.
• Ask open-ended questions so that they can briefly explain you. Also, keep in mind not to use questions that will make them feel bad depending on what they are sharing with you.

Please feel free to leave your comments or thoughts below. Also, like my post if you find it useful.

References

(n.d.). Retrieved from readytomanage: http://blog.readytomanage.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/giving-feedback-to-others.jpg

KENDY, W. F. (n.d.). How to Be a Good Listener. Retrieved from sellingpower: http://www.sellingpower.com/content/article/?a=6526/how-to-be-a-good-listener

Why "Being A Good Listener" Is Holding You Back. (n.d.). Retrieved from fastcompany: http://www.fastcompany.com/3049644/how-to-be-a-success-at-everything/why-being-a-good-listener-is-holding-you-back

Take notes

Do you wonder how to be a good listener in the class? This is the most common thing that students would think how to be. Am I correct?

http://cdn3.gurl.com/wp-content/gallery/straightasecrets/girl-taking-notes-in-class.jpg

It literally took me six months to get into the practice of taking notes. Once I have started, I found myself scoring A and A+ in my subjects. Do you want to archive the same results like me? Here are the ways:

Take notes when your professor is explaining a concept in the class. Taking notes helps you to remember concepts. It not only prepares you for your exam, but it forces you to listen more carefully during lectures. (TAKE EFFECTIVE NOTES, n.d.)

 https://www.howtostudy.com/take-effective-notes/

Also, when you make your own notes there is no chances for forgetting the concepts because you understand it first and then learn and write in your book. Also, you can refer to it easily anytime in case you forget.

Secondly, know what to take in your notes. When professor stresses a key concept learn to immediately note it in your book. Make it short and in simple terms whichever way it is effective for you. The reason is because, it could be the basics for solving other questions.

Thirdly, to be a good listener in the class try to focus only on what your instructor is talking in the class. Try not to get distracted by your friends. This is the only way you can have excellent listening skills and good judgement when you are taking notes.

If you feel this post was useful please don’t forget to like and comment. You can provide any ideas that will be helpful for others.

References

(n.d.). Retrieved from cdn3.gurl: http://cdn3.gurl.com/wp-content/gallery/straightasecrets/girl-taking-notes-in-class.jpg

TAKE EFFECTIVE NOTES. (n.d.). Retrieved from howtostudy: https://www.howtostudy.com/take-effective-notes/

Don't interrupt the speaker, listen first and then talk

Do you want to be a person where others come and talk to you? I am pretty sure everyone would love that and would be keen to know how to be.

https://assetsnffrgf-a.akamaihd.net/assets/m/g13/201312/g13_201312.art/102013446_univ_lsr_lg.jpg

Being a good listener does not come easy for some of us and it’s much more than hearing. The fact is listening takes time, practice and dedication by paying attention to what the other person is saying.

From my personal life, it literally took me two years to patiently get into the habit of listening to others. I used to be a person where I never listen and try distracting my friends when they come to talk to me. At the end, I found that they stopped sharing stories with me and this made me feel bad and realize my mistakes.

So, learn to get into the habit of listening more than talking. Learn to hold back your thoughts and opinion and pay attention in order to become a good listener. (The Art of Being a Good Listener, 2015)

https://www.thoughtworks.com/insights/blog/the-art-of-being-a-good-listener

Allow the speaker to speak first and complete their sentence because you will always get time to talk after they finish. If you keep interrupting them in middle you would basically not understand what they are trying to say.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UDE9RDS3ecs

Here are some good practice to be a good listener:

v  If you are not physically seeing a person learn to wait for two second after they end. This becomes very important when you are talking to someone on phone. (Smith, 2016)

 http://www.littlethingsmatter.com/blog/2010/03/03/10-ways-to-being-a-good-listener1/

v  When you are talking to your friend, a colleague, a supervisor learn to respect them. For example: If you interrupt them while they are speaking to you, ask them sorry and tell them to continue. This makes them feel you care for them and respect them by listening.

Try to follow these steps to become to a good listener. I hope this information would have given you some ideas. Please feel free if you have any comments about anything to add or say.

References

(n.d.). Retrieved from assetsnffrgf-a.akamaihd.net: https://assetsnffrgf-a.akamaihd.net/assets/m/g13/201312/g13_201312.art/102013446_univ_lsr_lg.jpg

Dubuque, M. (n.d.). What to say to people who interrupt you all the time. Retrieved from youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UDE9RDS3ecs

Smith, T. (n.d.). 10 Ways To Be A Good Listener. Retrieved from littlethingsmatter: http://www.littlethingsmatter.com/blog/2010/03/03/10-ways-to-being-a-good-listener1/

The Art of Being a Good Listener. (2015, june 30). Retrieved from thoughtworks: https://www.thoughtworks.com/insights/blog/the-art-of-being-a-good-listener